Paul Johnson sez: "I'm Looking for Trouble!"

Work: The New Four-Letter Word

By Paul Johnson

1,137 words. Abstract: For many of us, job satisfaction is elusive and work has become a four-letter word. Discover how you can upgrade your situation so you can be paid to play and make "work" go away.

"Savannah would be a good place to retire." That stray comment wafted my way from the folks conversing at a nearby Atlanta Bread Company table. Have you thought about where you would like to retire?

That's a trick question. The real question is: Why would you want to EVER retire? After all, if you love what you do AND you're getting paid for it, why would you ever want to stop?

"Obviously," you say, "Paul Johnson does not live on the same planet I do. My job is frustrating and unfulfilling, like it is for most everyone else I know." It seems everyone is working for the weekend.

Life Revived
What if it doesn't have to be that way? It's a shame to think we are missing out on our life, at least for 40 hours a week (who am I kidding? According to The Week magazine, the average male works 100 hours more per year than they did in the 1970's, while the average woman works 200 more hours.) In 1854 Henry David Thoreau wrote, "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." Does that apply to us today? After all, this life is the only one we get.

If "work" has become a dirty four-letter word for you, I bet I can guess your story. It's probably similar to mine. We finished school and had to find a full-time job (in my case, I started working BEFORE I finished school). We didn't have any experience so we couldn't be too picky. Eventually we accepted a job, not necessarily because the industry, or the work, or the future looked particularly exciting, but because it came with a marvelous fringe benefit known as a "paycheck. " Still it was all exciting because it was all new. Before we knew it, we developed our skills and got good at what we were doing. We earned promotions and raises, and soon acquired stuff like a mortgage, spouse, dog and 2.5 kids, not necessarily in that order. Somewhere along the way we realized that we're not too happy with what we're doing for work. Every day. Two hundred twenty days per year.

Did your "starter" job accidentally become your career? Perhaps "work" has become a dirty four-letter word because we feel trapped in an industry, a career or a company. We can't afford to make a change now. Because we accepted a job early on, we're expected to accept our lot in life now. Oops.

Fresh Advice
For decades young people have been encouraged to pursue what they're good at irrespective of what they like to do. My high-school counselor told me my high test scores meant I could "do anything I wanted." That was so NOT helpful. Nobody suggested I should consider a career choice based on something I actually LIKED to do. As a result we stop exploring our options when we're much too young, and then settle on a career much too early.

Here's the problem I suspect you'd like to solve: you would like to find a way to get paid as much or more than you do now, and derive more satisfaction from work. In short, you'd like to get paid well to play.

Let's explore this using three simple concepts, Good, Like and Pay. For many of us, we accepted a job and got Good at it such that employers are willing to Pay us to do it. Unfortunately a lot of Like is missing, so we engage in weekend hobbies such as tennis, fishing or reading to fill that void. If we could have a "redo at life," we would be better served to have explored things that we're Good at that we also Like, and then find a way to make it Pay.

If you could find a way to do that now, you'll earn much more tomorrow than you do today. Why? When you Like your work, you immerse yourself in it. You're happy to read more on the subject, and you're happy to think, explore, and analyze related topics why you're taking showers, doing laundry and cutting grass. When you can immerse yourself in something you love for 40 + hours a week, it doesn't take long to develop expertise that will make you highly valued and highly paid in any domain. As the late Earl Nightingale observed, one half hour of study per day will make you a nationally known expert in that field in just five years. Do you like what you do well enough to study it for a half-hour every day, or is reality TV more appealing?

Play in the Intersection
Here's what you can do to start making the shift. First, take inventory of what you're Good at and what others, like your employer, will Pay you to do. That's a great foundation.

Next, observe what you Like. Specifically, take note of the experiences that you enjoy recreating for yourself time and time again.

Third, explore different ideas and options for ways to combine what you're Good at with what you Like to do in ways that will Pay. Put together a plan to move you to that intersection.

When you execute your plan to move you to the center of Good, Like and Pay, your work will truly become your play. Retirement? Forget about it!

What do you have to lose? Trade in those unfulfilled dreams and feelings of frustration for joy, fun, satisfaction... and more money, if that's what you want.

Play with Purpose
If you're searching for purpose in your life, consider this: God doesn't want you to settle. He (or She) gave you talents and abilities, likes and dislikes, so you can make a valuable contribution to the world we all live in and be rewarded in ways that will truly satisfy our needs. Don't believe the myth that work and play are mutually exclusive. It's merely coincidental that work and play are both four letter words.

James A. Michener offers:
"The master in the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his information and his recreation, his love and his religion. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence at whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him he's always doing both."

Of course, these are just a few of my observations and opinions. I may be full of it. . . or not. But I am wondering, what's keeping you from solving this problem for yourself? What successes have you had in finding a balance between Good, Like and Pay so you could make work your play? If you'd like to continue the conversation, please feel free to share your Comments below.

© 2008 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson the Trouble Breaker is a keynote speaker who works with organizations to convert trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Visit http://TroubleBreaker.com for leadership presentations on performance improvement. Call Paul direct in Atlanta, Georgia, USA at (770) 271-7719.   

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

Performance Improvement in a Sorry State

I recently read a great article by Julie Cohen titled Sorry No More that expands on my article, The Sorry Epidemic, which I posted on September 5, 2007.

As you may remember, my article suggests that we say "sorry" way too much, and at inappropriate times. Julie gives some specific examples of how great performance is negated when workers are needlessly sorry. Plus, she suggests how we can analyze why we might use "I'm sorry" when we really mean something else, and how that self-awareness can lead to performance improvement and business breakthroughs for our careers (Julie's specialty is career coaching and work-life balance).

You can find Julie Cohen's website and some great career resources at www.juliecohencoaching.com.

The "Thanks for Your Time" Crime

By Paul Johnson

443 words. Abstract: If you ever find yourself saying, "Thank you for your time," you're creating issues for yourself that can damage relationships. If you're in sales, the costs are high. Learn the hidden meanings in this seemingly safe phrase and what you can substitute to improve your position.

It happened again, but I'm not surprised. As the insurance salesman was wrapping up our meeting, he shook my hand and said, "Thanks for your time." I thought to myself, "What a crime."

He was being polite, and I welcome that. He genuinely appreciated the time I devoted to our interaction. His thank-you was acknowledging the value of the time I had "spent" with him because we all know "time is money." Unfortunately he -- like many of us -- failed to notice the hidden meaning in that seemingly harmless phrase that subtly sabotages our sales.

Killer Questions
"Your time is valuable. Mine isn't." That's what you tell me when you say, "Thanks for your time." Apparently you have nothing better to do with YOUR time than talk with me.

• Could it be you're not very good at your job, and people are rarely willing to talk with you?
• Might I wonder if you're desperate for a sale?
• Are you less than busy because you or your offerings are inferior such that I'd be better off dealing with your competition?

All the energy and preparation you've expended to establish credibility with me, engender confidence, and establish the value of what you offer is subtly and suddenly diminished when you thank me for my time. After all, if you truly believe the services you offer are valuable, why would you say anything to imply your inferiority?

Decisions Rewarded
We can still be polite without compromising our position. Instead of thanking prospects for their time, we could thank them for something that will lead us closer to the sale. For instance, we could say:

• "Thanks for opting to meet with me."
• "Thanks for deciding to take a closer look at this opportunity."
• "Thank you for choosing to come to my office."

Ultimately we're going to ask the prospect to make a buying decision. By thanking them for making a choice, you're giving them verbal applause for their wise decision to meet with you. Plus, you are reinforcing the value of additional decisions you may suggest in the future. Thanking your prospects for making a choice improves your position with them instead of hindering it.

Serve Without Subservience
Always remember that what you offer is valuable, as is the time you commit to delivering the details that describe it. In the land where "all men are created equal," don't commit the crime of forgetting that and reducing yourself to a subservient position by thanking others for their time. Compliment their decisions instead. You'll maintain peer status with your buyer, elevate yourself to advisor status faster, and accelerate your sales success.

© 2008 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson is Founder of ConsultativeSelling.com and a keynote speaker. He works with organizations like ADP, Nortel Networks and AutoNation to convert sales trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Learn how to apply Consultative Selling at http://ConsultativeSelling.com/.

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author (byline) information we provide at the end of the article.

Competitive PowerPoint

Here's a follow-up to my article of April 1, 2007, The PowerPoint Dozen Dare, where I suggest you can sell anything in 12 slides or less.

Two architects in Tokyo have a different take; they'll let you use 20 slides, but only allow 20 seconds each! That's right, you're done in 6 minutes 40 seconds. Astrid Klein and Mark Dytham are credited by Wired Magazine with creating "pecha-kucha" (peh-CHAHCH-kuh), and it has taken off as a creative art form.  Local venues around the world are embracing Pecha-Kucha Nights, where volunteers can present their creative works, concepts and ideas using PowerPoint in the strictly-timed format. Right here in Atlanta, it's at Octane Coffee Lounge. Some events are even structured as competitions, with prizes awarded to the fan favorite.

Who could have imagined that folks would VOLUNTARILY go to a club and sit through one PowerPoint presentation after another??!!  Yes, PowerPoint may still be the bane of meetings and the crutch of choice for poor presenters, but it's clear that in the right hands it can be a powerful and engaging tool for selling ideas and much more.

PowerPoint is a registered trademark of Microsoft Corporation.

© 2008 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

Performance Improvement Through Planned Spontaneity

By Paul Johnson

1,124 words. Abstract:  Guarantee yourself performance improvement in all your business interactions. Discover the unseemly combination of "planned spontaneity" and learn the three steps that can turn moments of awkwardness into displays of brilliance.

Robin Williams is considered a genius in the business of comedy. His performances seem natural and spontaneous, yet many of his ad libs are planned. When he finds himself in a situation he has anticipated, he already knows exactly what to say to get a laugh. Push E-5 on the Robin Williams laughter vending machine and you'll come away with a snicker.

While comedians prepare for social interactions, few business people do. We prefer to rely on our experience to "wing it." We readily plunk ourselves down in a business setting and assume whatever we say or do will be good enough with no improvement necessary. No comedian ever earned a reputation as a top performer with that attitude and neither will you.

Planned spontaneity enables you to take advantage of opportunities to impress. Success will pursue you when you consistently deliver smooth, polished, confident, successful, and promotable performance. Conversely, earning a reputation as someone who blurts out embarrassment in unpredictable ways is killing their career one dissonant ad lib at a time. Your career performance will shine with improvement when you use planned spontaneity to polish your reputation. Soon you'll move from mundanely average to exceptionally brilliant.

Prepare Naturally
Planning to be spontaneous may seem like a contradiction. This only seems unnatural in the social world, as we do it naturally in the physical and mental worlds all the time. If a child runs in front of your moving car, you will spontaneously slam on the brakes. Four plus four equals ... you already have the answer. We have planned to address situations like these so our responses are spontaneous.

Socially, we may not be as well-prepared. If I ask you, "What do you do for a living?" you'll likely have an answer for me, but could your answer use improvement? If asked, "What are you doing Saturday night?" are you really prepared to answer that? When a prospective customer states, "Your price is too high!" are you prepared, or will you "wing it" yet again?

If you're a little uneasy, don't assume you're the only one. We all went through the same school system. We were conditioned to deal with problems as the teachers gave them to us. We were not taught to think ahead and come up with solutions for possible problems. We learned to deal only with the problems right in front of us because that's all we needed to know to pass the test.

Planned spontaneity may feel like an unseemly oxymoron. We don't want to be perceived as unnatural or robotic. We believe if we prepare our words or follow a script, we will sound phony and lose all credibility. This imagined fear does not have to be your reality as performers like Robin Williams prove every day. You can immediately enjoy improvement in your performance at work by applying these three steps:

1. Pre-See
When you Pre-See in a social situation, it's much like looking far down the road in front of you when driving. We're safest when we observe the full panorama, considering what other vehicles are doing, the shape and condition of the road, the color of taillights, and the potential situations we may find ourselves in soon. Conversely, if we only focus on what's immediately in front of our grill it won't be long before we crash.

Watch people around you and get in the habit of Pre-Seeing yourself in potential situations. Observe how one person's behavior influences another's response. When you observe good behavior, make a point to copy it. When you find yourself thinking, "That was awkward!" make plans to ensure you never find yourself as unprepared as they were.

For example, we all like to be remembered yet most of us forget names occasionally. When you've already forgotten the name of the person you met two minutes ago, you've got a problem. If you can Pre-See yourself in this situation, it's time to Pre-Think.

2. Pre-Think
You can avoid the risks associated with thinking on your feet by Pre-Thinking the perfect actions to take. Prepare what you want to say or do in advance when you're under no pressure to think. You'll have time to come up with some options, and then choose the best one.

In my Mastering Objections sales training course, I have participants Pre-Think responses to their six most common objections. I show them 10 different response techniques and then invite them to Pre-Think how they can apply each to handle their six sales objections. Each prepared response is written down so they can use them on Monday morning. This Pre-Thinking gives them sixty different ways to handle objections and avoid deal-killing situations. It's Pre-Thinking like this that enables the average person to deliver a brilliant performance under pressure.

Pre-Thinking allows us to ask, "What could I do?" and then "What WILL I do?" in advance so our spontaneous reactions are naturally correct. What alternatives can you Pre-Think right now that could enable you to elegantly recover after you've forgotten another's name?

3. Pre-Do
If your Pre-Thinking has enabled you to capture the perfect response, your brilliant effort becomes worthless if you lack the courage to use your response. To overcome any fear of sounding less than spontaneous, it's important to practice, or Pre-Do, what you plan on saying or doing. You can preview it in your head and test it on others. Some people find role-playing helpful. Take time to Pre-Do until it sounds so natural and unforced people won't guess you thought it out in advance.

Of course, you don't have time for any of this. Today's go-go work world almost makes taking time to plan seem like a luxury. Time starvation causes everyone to stay focused on the problem right in front of them. Yet you must do at least enough to put the results of your Pre-Seeing and Pre-Thinking into action. Yes, you must do the Pre-Do.

What do I do what I've forgotten someone's name? I say, "I'm sorry, I've misplaced your name. Would you give it to me again?" And soon I'm off the hook.

Predict Tomorrow's History
We can't prepare for everything, but we know that history tends to repeat itself. Plan to be spontaneous when:

• A social opportunity is probable and likely repetitive
• A less-than-brilliant performance carries dire consequences

You can be sure you're bringing your best thinking to critical business interactions when you have done your thinking in advance. Consider planned spontaneity to be an investment instead of more work. Average preparation will only yield average performance.

The late comedian Jack Benny said, "My best ad libs are the ones I rehearsed the most." Develop planned spontaneity and tomorrow you'll be proud of your performance improvement today.

© 2008 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson the Trouble Breaker works with organizations to convert trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Discover concepts for performance improvement at http://ShortcutsToResults.com.

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

What Sales People Need in a Down Economy

By Paul Johnson

850 words. Abstract: Selling can't slow down just because the economy does. Learn how to protect your business from economic disaster by helping your sales people get the one thing they need to sell in a down economy.

It takes something special to sell in a down economy. Unless sales people are properly equipped, it's easy for them to get discouraged and give up, perhaps before they even get started. When salespeople stop selling, falling revenues eventually cause pain for all employees and can threaten the very existence of the business. That's why it's in everybody's best interest to ensure that every salesperson has the one thing that will keep them producing sales in a down economy.

Clue Me Down
First, how can we be sure we're experiencing a down economy? Here are some headlines that appeared in newspapers over the last 30 days: 

• Home foreclosure rate soars in 2007 
• State's unemployment rate jumps 
• Bankruptcy filings up 24% in Georgia

Statistics like that could easily discourage any sales person. The changing environment means they'll soon be facing unfamiliar selling challenges they are not confident they can handle. Any salesperson could righteously proclaim, "The economy is killing me!"

If that were true, I should already be dead.

Leggo My Ego
As I share this story from my past, please don't discount it as self-serving ego aggrandizement. I offer it to give perspective. Besides, facts are facts, and these are the facts.

I started my direct selling career in 1979. In 1981 and 1982, I was an award-winning sales leader at my company (ask me, and I'll show you my diamond ring, earned through an incentive program. Actually, I earned two diamonds; my wife claimed the bigger one). Here are some indicators of how the economy of 1981 compared to 2007:

• 2007:
  • 6.34% = Mortgage Interest Rate
  • 4.61% = Unemployment Rate
  • 2.85% = Inflation Rate

• 1981:
  • 16.63% = Mortgage Interest Rate
  • 7.62% = Unemployment Rate
  • 10.35% = Inflation Rate

To come close to duplicating the horrific economy of 1981, you'd have to go back to the Great Depression of the 1930's. Yet here I was, a "newbie" salesperson facing an economy that could easily kill off my new sales career. Yet I had something that enabled me to not just survive, but thrive in a difficult environment.

Sell Yourself with Critical Thinking
My competitors may have gotten discouraged, but the daily news didn't bother me much. I learned to use critical thinking skills to evaluate what I was reading in the newspaper. When I saw "state's unemployment rate jumps," I looked closer. The "jump" was from 4.2% to 4.6%, a 9.5% increase in just one month... pretty alarming. But what does that really mean to me as a salesperson? It means that last month, out of 250 people, 10.5 were unemployed. This month, 11.5 are unemployed. We lost one suspect out of every 250 people. Should that slow down our selling efforts? I don't think so.

What about "home foreclosure rate soars in 2007"? The article reveals that the rate is 79 percent higher in 2007 compared to 2006. While that's a sizable increase, it still means that 99 percent of all U.S. households are NOT facing foreclosure, leaving them as potential suspects for you.

Check out the bankruptcy filing statistics, and in a like manner you'll find that the vast majority of people still have jobs. They are earning money they can spend on your products and services... if you have what it takes to stay in the selling game despite a down economy.

Get Rid of Dis
When you're feeling discouraged with the down economy, you need only one thing to "sell the lights out": courage. The difference between where you are and what you need is simply dis. Remove dis, and you can replace discourage with courage. You can gain all the courage you need to succeed through Perspective, Plan and Persistence.

Create Your Own Courage
PERSPECTIVE involves using your critical thinking skills to evaluate the reality of your situation. Reporters write headlines to sell newspapers, not to help you keep an optimistic outlook. Use critical thinking skills as in the examples above to ensure you keep proper perspective. This down economy, like every other one before, is temporary.

PLAN a way to deal with the challenges that a down economy can bring. Write down your goals and objectives, and find ways to gather and measure feedback as you execute. Retain flexibility so you can make course corrections and adjust your plan as you learn what's working in a down economy.

PERSISTENCE is perhaps most important of all. It means getting up every day and putting your plan into action. It means continuing to sell even when the headlines suck. It means being too busy selling to even bother reading the headlines.

Make Time for P's
It's easy to get discouraged in a down economy. Everyday the media is happy to tell us why things are so terrible. As Nicholas Murray Butler noted, "Optimism is the foundation of courage."

Discouraged, you fail. With courage, you succeed. The difference is simply dis.

Salespeople can find courage to thrive by beginning each selling day with a review of the importance of Perspective, Plan, and Persistence. Do that and you can find diamonds in any down economy.

© 2008 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson is Founder of ConsultativeSelling.com and a keynote speaker. He works with organizations like ADP, Nortel Networks and AutoNation to convert sales trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Learn how to apply Consultative Selling at http://ConsultativeSelling.com/.

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

This Country Walks With Crutches

917 words. Abstract: Our society is getting shortchanged, and not just at the cash register. Convenient crutches interfere with development of critical thinking skills. Discover how to lead the way to a more potent, intelligent and resourceful organization.

After taking my order, the young man behind the register announced, "That'll be $6.96." I handed him seven dollars and a penny. The puzzled look on his face made it clear he had no idea what to do with that penny. After what seemed like a long time, I explained, "I'd like a nickel back." He reached in the register with a doubtful look yet gave me the nickel I was expecting. The transaction was complete, but I couldn't stop thinking about what really happened.

Webster's Dictionary defines a crutch as "a supporting stick fitted under the armpit in walking." I'm generally opposed to having sticks fitted anywhere, including under the armpit. It's true we all need a little help now and then, but relying on crutches day to day doesn't make life easier. In my case, they only make my armpits sore.

Think Again
In the story above, the crutch the young man used was the cash register. It supported him so he had no need of basic math skills. The business owner depends on a "smart" cash register that is programmed to correctly compute an order, add in sales tax and display the total. The clerk enters the cash received, and change due is computed. Only one thing is missing from this process; the clerk is never required to think. The more the manager and employees rely on these crutches, the dumber the organization becomes.

As a society we've come to depend on crutches that allow us to be weak, stupid and lazy. I believe we should automate tasks only when we understand how to do them manually. That means:

• Use a shovel before jumping behind the controls of a backhoe.
• Plan a trip on a fold-out map before running to MapQuest.
• Master addition and subtraction (with a pencil and paper if not in your head) before turning on a calculator or cash register.

Today's leaders are shortchanging our society when they hand crutches to people who have never learned to fully "walk" on their own. Which leaders do I mean? Parents, teachers and business owners all play important roles in training the folks who will be responsible for generating tomorrow's economic prosperity, the folks I'm counting on to fund my Social Security checks someday.

Support Hosed
Spell Check is a great convenience, and I'm thankful that my word processing software incorporated it long ago. I still keep the old-fashioned dictionary and thesaurus (it even sounds like a dinosaur, doesn't it?) close to my desk for those times when Spell Check can't cut it. Spell Check is a great tool, but it is just one tool that doesn't work in every situation. When all you have is a hammer, stay far away from me. Leaders can ensure that many different tools are available, that they are current, and that all are trained to use them.

Librarians are often stereotyped (I'm thinking a nerd with no social life whose ears would start bleeding during the first set at a Stones concert), but one thing we should reasonably expect from them is expertise about libraries. Hey, it's their job, right? I approached the reference desk of my local library and asked if they had any books that could give me a specific type of business information. The librarian asked, "Did you try looking it up on the computer?" I have no proof (can't let that stop me), but I suspect my county government decided they didn't need to hire experts in library science to staff the libraries because each branch was given a crutch called a searchable database. All staff is needed for today is to help patrons to check out books, and then put the books back on the shelves when they're returned. You can't even get a good "Shhh" anymore.

Leadership has pushed for cost-savings through self-service, which usually translates into no service at all. As the comedienne Lily Tomlin once quipped, "We're all in this alone." Technology crutches and a lack of social interaction only amplify the need for critical thinking.

Do Not Pass Goal
Board games have long been a way to socialize our young people. For example, Monopoly by Hasbro is a great way to foster critical thinking traits in a competitive environment. Players learn about strategy, flexibility, negotiation, cash flow and asset management. Unfortunately the new "improved" Monopoly is unsuitable for children. Monopoly Electronic Banking has replaced the pretty Monopoly money with debit cards. Players no longer have to handle cash or do the accounting! For adults familiar with the game, the new version does play faster. For children, speed comes at the expense of learning. When children lose, they have no idea why. Stupid. While they may feel confused and unsatisfied after playing this "updated" game, at least their armpits don't hurt from the debit card.

Our leaders of tomorrow depend on the leaders of today to ensure they are trained to think. It’s critical we teach our children, our students and our employees how and why things work, so they can think for themselves. Turn off the technology now and then and ask folks to "rough it" using only their minds and a pencil and paper. Make sure your people are proficient with hand tools before you turn the power on. Play games that require solving problems using both the hands and the head. Pretty soon we'll all be more potent, intelligent and resourceful, and we'll be happy to leave all the crutches in the corner.

© 2008 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson the Trouble Breaker is a keynote speaker who works with organizations to convert trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Visit http://TroubleBreaker.com for leadership presentations on performance improvement. Call Paul direct in Atlanta, Georgia, USA at (770) 271-7719.

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

How to be Politically Inept this Christmas

By Paul Johnson

596 words. Abstract: The Politically Correct really aren't that much fun. Whether you celebrate Christmas or any other December holiday, you and all you greet can enjoy brighter moments when you discover why and how to join the League of the Politically Inept.

There, now it's out there; the "C" word, Christmas. Somehow it's become politically incorrect to wish others Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa or anything that suggests a belief system. Well, I've decided to forgo political correctness at the risk of being labeled "politically inept" this holiday season.

Be Different in December
I choose to celebrate in December because Christmas is in it. You may celebrate in December for a different reason. I not only respect but cherish that diversity among us. Yet that diversity is discounted and stripped away from us when the Politically Correct (P.C.) Police force all to be the same by restricting us to Happy Holidays and Seasons Greetings. Can we Americans afford any more loss of our identities? Can we afford to lose the meanings behind our traditions, actions and feelings?

The advent and proliferation of social media encourage us to "live in the open." Tools like LinkedIn, Facebook and YouTube enable us to share what makes us human. In theory, our humanity should make us more desirable as a business associate. When you defy the P.C. Police and offer a greeting with more flavor than Seasons Greetings, we learn you are a person of character and courage as well as spirited and thoughtful. Much is shared in less than 2 seconds!

Speak Your Peace of Mind
We're entitled to all speak our own "language" of the season. Consider that, as an example, if one of us speaks Spanish, another French and the third Italian, none of us can be accused of being wrong. Background, upbringing and, sometimes, life choices enable each of us to express ourselves in a preferred way. I prefer to offer Merry Christmas because it has meaning in its language that I understand best and represents the best expression I've got to give. The P.C. Police stand ready to chastise us for choosing the "wrong" form of expression. I'm giving others a gift of my heartfelt wishes; Merry Christmas enables me to present those wishes with the clearest and strongest meaning I know. By watering the message down to Happy Holidays, I feel like I'm cheating you, giving you less than the best I have to offer.

I can accept that not everyone will be happy with my gift of Merry Christmas. Some will take offense, but that's because they choose to be offended. They're so concerned with their own selfish perspective of the way things ought to be, they can't see my gift for what it is. Let's face it; some people are looking for reasons to be offended.

Give Your Gift Any Way
You must be willing to get into trouble now and then if you're ever going to be comfortable using your preferred greeting at every opportunity. When you occasionally find someone who takes exception, is offended and won't accept your gift, don't blame yourself for their problem. I refuse to walk on eggshells because someone might want to pick a fight over my choice of words. Saying Merry Christmas doesn't mean I'm pushing religion; I don't expect anyone will convert to Christianity because I offered them a Merry Christmas!

I encourage you to join The League of the Politically Inept and give your greeting gifts at every opportunity during December. I'm convinced most people appreciate it, and your encouragement emboldens them to do the same. When December is over the politically inept will have had a lot more fun than the politically correct. Don't forget the reason you celebrate this season, and continue to be generous with your gift of your favorite greeting.

© 2007 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

Article Post:
About The Author:
Paul Johnson the Trouble Breaker is a keynote speaker who works with organizations to convert trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Discover breakthrough concepts at http://ShortcutsToResults.com. Visit http://TroubleBreaker.com for presentations on performance improvement.

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

Marketing Lessons from the Business of Football

By Paul Johnson

1.326 words. Abstract: The football game on the field has little to do with why butts are on the bleachers. Football teaches important marketing lessons that we can apply to gain more customers and fill a stadium of our own.

People don't go to football games to watch football. Oh, a few people do, but not enough to come close to filling the stadium. To find out who the pure fans are, you'd have to do away with the video screens, the mascots, the cheerleaders, the halftime shows, any foods more exotic than hot dogs, soft drinks and peanuts, and then see who's left in the stands. Would you still buy a ticket?

Football is more than a game; it's also a business. The business of football has grown because the promise included with each ticket has grown to appeal to more than just the pure fans. Does your business cater solely to your pure fans? If so, you're sitting on a tremendous growth opportunity.

No One Wants Your Product
We forget that people don't really want our product; they want what they can do with our product. Take coffee as an example. If we focus on the coffee itself, it's easy to get caught up in the price per pound or per cup, and the qualities that make coffee taste good or bad. Yet when we think about what we can do with the coffee, those factors become almost insignificant.

The place where coffee is served (the coffee shop) becomes the backdrop for a social event with friends or business acquaintances; the price of the coffee becomes insignificant. Perhaps coffee is the warm, comforting friend that accompanies us on our journey into the new book we just picked up at a Barnes and Noble book store. Whenever we buy coffee or football tickets or your product or service, we are buying much more than what the label on the package indicates.

Get a Feel for the Game
Football organizations discovered long ago they can enjoy significant boosts in business by looking at all the ways to serve their customers during a football game. By expanding the core product -- the game on the field -- to appeal to a larger audience, their market grows beyond the pure fans to include their spouses, other family members and their friends. In the process, football organizations enjoy multiple up-sell opportunities while engendering customer loyalty that keeps fans coming back. You don't have to love football to love going to a football game.

While your product or service may not be as flashy and exciting as football, you can apply football's marketing lessons to improve your market share, revenues and profits. If you don't, you risk seeing your sales fall flat and watching business go to your competition. If companies can apply these marketing principles to a product as simple as coffee, you can win using these strategies, too.

Unfortunately, we may be too close to our product to successfully apply these principles. We likely know the features and benefits of our product inside and out, and understand all the things our customers can do with our product. What's more important is that we step back and work to understand how people feel while using our product. Find out the feelings your customers associate with using your product or service, and then think of ways to give them more of those feelings. Here are three ways you can do that.

1. Ain't I Social!
Many people use a product or service as an excuse to get together with other people. Football tickets, coffee shops, birthday cakes, bowling leagues - people may buy these products solely to enjoy the feelings they get when they're experiencing them with other people.

Think of ways to get people who share a common interest in your product or service to socialize around it. Consider:

• Conferences
• Online chat rooms
• Reunions
• Rallies
• User groups
• Advanced training sessions
• Charitable work

Any event, really, can be the perfect excuse for your customers to gather and experience the great positive feelings that will generate customer loyalty and keep them coming back for more.

2. Make it Memorable
When customers have a good experience with your product, they'll want to repeat it so they can recreate those good feelings. Ideally our customers will talk about their experience with their friends and associates long after the experience is over. You can extend the power of this word of mouth effect. Help your customers remember their positive feelings long after the experience that created them is over.

Memories are heightened when emotions are involved. The stronger the emotions, the stronger the feelings, the longer and more powerfully we remember them. At football games we watch instant replays of key moments; the turning points and dazzling plays worth remembering. We buy programs that allow us to engage at a deeper level with the personal aspects of the players. Sometimes we're provided with heart-stopping opportunities to win prizes. Souvenirs allow us to take the football game home with us; we can relive the feelings we had at the game simply by looking at or holding our souvenir.

Get your customers emotionally involved so they'll long remember the positive experiences they have with your product or service.

• Provide mementos.
• Give them a chance to win something.
• Deliver a nice surprise they don't expect.
• Give them moments with industry celebrities.
• Take pictures, especially of them, to give them vivid reminders of the great experience they had.

Do these things, and they'll do business with you over and over again.

3. Include the Fringe
Around your core customers -- the pure fans -- is a fringe of secondary customers you can easily access. These secondary customers may be spouses or friends of your core customers who are easily reached through viral marketing. Give thought as to how to provide for their social needs and create positive, memorable feelings that will encourage them to try you once and then come back again and again.

The football business has this figured out. The football lovers in a household have an easier time getting to games when their non-football-loving spouse is eager to go with them. That's why a football ticket provides so much more than the game these days. While marketing the game to pure fans is a simple endeavor, football becomes a much better business when the offer is expanded to include the social and emotional aspects that appeal to the secondary market. For example, the Super Bowl has become more of a party than a game. People plan for and look forward to the huge social event that engulfs this championship game. Millions watch the Super Bowl on TV, yet few watch it alone.

Get in touch with your market and work to understand who your secondary customers are. Coffee shops gladly sell tea and soft drinks so their "regulars" can easily bring along their non-coffee drinking friends. Expand your marketing to include these secondary customers and you can boost your sales revenues by 50% and more.

The Game of Change
Football as a game hasn't changed much over the decades. The proposal to permit challenge flags supported by video review was carefully debated by National Football League (NFL) officials before its adoption, all because the League knows this; never alienate your pure fans. They are the bedrock of your business. Keep delivering the solid, consistent product that keeps them coming back for more.

Don't focus on improving your product. Instead, focus on improving the product experience. Once you understand the positive feelings your customers experience by using your product or service, look for ways to extend that experience. Sure, cream and sugar go with coffee. But so does a soft chair and soothing music. So does a well-written book of fiction. So does a table surrounded by family or friends.

Football is a game and it is a business. Look at your business like a game. How does it feel to do business with you today? Make your business social. Make it memorable. Make your business the game your customers are eager to play.

© 2007 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson works with organizations to convert trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Discover concepts for marketing breakthroughs at http://ShortcutsToResults.com.

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

The Top Five Traits of a Successful Salesperson

By Paul Johnson

855 words. Abstract: If you need to hire a salesperson, these tips will reduce your risk of making a bad hire. Learn how the author, a veteran salesperson and award-winning sales manager, filters sales applicants. Discover how to identify the candidates who not only CAN sell, but WILL sell - for YOU.

If you're looking for a successful salesperson to hire -- a salesperson who not only CAN sell but WILL sell -- look for a salesperson with PRIDE.

PRIDE is an acronym for 5 characteristics that will help ensure that the salesperson you hire will get the job done for you and make the revenue results you desire a reality.

PRIDE stands for:

•    Proven
•    Respectful
•    Innovative
•    Decisive
•    Enthusiastic

Proven
Proven refers to the candidate's track record. Have they delivered results? More importantly, who else says so besides them? As you know, resumes can be fact, or they can be fiction. How can you tell the difference?

A person who has been successful producing results should be able to provide you with third party proof. Have the candidate bring in their sales awards, including plaques, trophies and pictures from the trips they've earned. Have them show you the stack-ranked sales reports showing their name at or near the top of the field.

More importantly, what do their customers have to say about them? Can the candidate produce testimonial letters from their customers, indicating they were satisfied with the buying experience? Candidates should be able to furnish written recommendations proving that they were able to deliver tangible results.

Respectful
Salespeople should approach being Respectful from two positions. First, they need to be respectful of others. Careful listeners, these salespeople would never be regarded as pushy because they take the time to hear their prospects out. They keep their egos in check, remembering that everyone can make a valuable contribution in their own way and that other team members deserve respect, too.

Second, your salespeople need to respect themselves. Expect them to have a quiet confidence in their own abilities, and a strong desire to use their time, talents, and skills to produce optimal results. They'll respect their health, physical needs, and family commitments, and as a result be refreshed, well-balanced, and ready for work each day.

Self-respect allows salespeople to be assertive, ensuring that they won't allow themselves to be used as a doormat by prospects who want to waste their time or abuse a relationship.

Innovative
An Innovative salesperson is a problem-solver. They're able to quickly assess a prospect's situation, and then come up with an approach to help the prospect accomplish their objectives. Reactive salespeople need not apply. Proactive salespeople spontaneously look for ways to do the job better, to improve on past successes, to show better results even faster than before.

Innovative salespeople are easy to manage, because they don't require instructions. They're pretty much point and shoot; give them an objective to aim for, and they can creatively approach obstacles and move past them.

Because they are innovative, they tend to look at the world through fresh eyes, and hence have a good sense of humor. A willingness to be playful and funny is a good clue that you're talking with an innovator. Good news! Your buyers would prefer to do business with someone who can make them chuckle and lighten up their day.

Decisive
A Decisive salesperson can make up their mind. They have effective critical thinking skills that allow them to rapidly size up a situation and decide how to best approach it. Decisiveness is truly important for a salesperson, for how can they expect the buyer to make a decision when they can't make one themselves?

Decisiveness is often related to owning a clear set of key moral values. It's easy for salespeople to consistently do the right thing when it's clear to them what the right thing is. You want decisive salespeople who know when to walk away from a bad deal, and can separate good prospects from the time-wasters.

Enthusiastic
Enthusiastic salespeople have become a cliché for all the wrong reasons. Enthusiasm must be more than an induced rush spawned by a rah-rah motivational pep talk. If you want enthusiasm that lasts, you need to find salespeople who are eager to help your customers.

You want salespeople who are excited about what they do and how they do it, so their curiosity is stimulated and they are inspired to continually learn on their own. Enthusiasm comes from believing that you can make a difference, that you can improve someone's situation when they do business with you.

Enthusiastic salespeople are motivated when they understand the strategy that will help them succeed, when they have access to all the tools they need to allow them to do their job and serve the customer, and when tactical training is available to allow them to skillfully serve the customer as well as the company. Enthusiastic salespeople have every right to believe they can win. And they do.

Hire a Compete Package
From the salesperson's perspective, PRIDE is about feeling good about your job. It's about believing in yourself and your ability to deliver. It's about enjoying yourself, helping the customer, and making the most of your God-given talents and abilities. It's about recognizing individual contributions and abilities while respecting the value of the team. When you hire salespeople with PRIDE, you, your salespeople, and your customers all win.

© 2007 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson is Founder of ConsultativeSelling.com. He works with organizations like ADP, Nortel Networks and AutoNation to convert sales trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Discover the application and definition of Consultative Selling at http://consultativeselling.com/

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

Territory Management Tips in Selling Power

The September 2007 edition of Selling Power Magazine features valuable tips for sales people who sell within a geographic territory.

In "In the Details: 10 Territory Management Tips for Better Results" on page 34, I share strategies that I developed when I sold in a geographic territory by car. Here are a couple of my tips that you'll find in the Selling Power article.

Divide your territory into four quadrants and assign a day of the week to each one, Monday through Thursday. Make calls in Quadrant 1 on Monday, Quadrant 2 on Tuesday, and so on. Use Friday as a flex day for catch-up, telephone work, and "emergency" appointments. Using this approach, you'll spend less time in your car and more time in front of prospects.

Be careful about chasing so-called "hot" leads.  You want to book appointments with prospects on the days that you're planning to be in their quadrant.  During your initial telephone conversation with a prospect, evaluate them against these 3 criteria:

• Do they want what you sell?
• Do they have the ability to effectively use your product or service?
• Is there a compelling event with a time deadline?

Only if the answer to all 3 questions is "Yes" should you consider deviating from your quadrant planning.

Here's a tip that didn't make the article: buy a car with a sunroof. While you're at an appointment, the sun can turn your locked-up car into a sauna. When jumping in and out of my car while making stops all day, I leave my sunroof open and the windows up. When I return to my car, the inside is no hotter than the outside temp, and it's easier to keep cool between appointments. I've done this for years and no one has ever bothered my car (keep valuables out of sight, lock the doors) and no flyover bird has ever blessed my interior.

You can buy the September 2007 issue of Selling Power and other back issues at http://www.sellingpower.com/magazine/archive/. Currently, they're just $5 each.

Customers Want More Than Your Best Price

By Paul Johnson

1,067 words. Abstract: When prospective customers ask salespeople to quote their best price, they really would rather have something more important. Three consultative selling actions result in more business from happier customers at higher profits.

Everyone likes a good deal. Unfortunately we salespeople may mistakenly accept that a good deal for the customer requires that we quote our best price.

That mistake is costly. It can rob us and our company of profits we need and deserve. It can shrink our close rate and cause buyers to act irrationally. When we give prospects a good deal instead of best price we will close more business with happier customers at higher profits.

We can help every customer get a good deal if they will let us take a consultative approach. While no one likes to be sold, it's difficult for customers today to buy what they really need. The global marketplace that is easily accessed through the Internet presents buyers with more choices for potential solutions than ever before. More choices mean more confusion, and confusion causes fear and irrational behavior. Prospects attempt to reduce fear associated with making the wrong purchase by looking for a simple test that will make the "right" choice obvious.

We often do the same thing when choosing candidates in political elections. Rather than immerse ourselves in the complexities of all the issues and then attempt to select the best (or least worse) candidate, we sometimes choose a major issue that we care about (examples might include abortion rights, immigration, the death penalty, gun control or free trade) and then choose candidates based on where they stand on that one issue. Creating a simple test ensures that we'll get at least one thing that's important to us in a candidate. Likewise when we're confused about what we want out of a purchase decision it's easy to revert to the simple-to-measure issue of price.

When your prospect asks for your best price you can confidently assure them you will give them a good deal if you will take time to follow through on three consultative actions during your selling encounters.

I. Consider the Whole Product
Every product or service typically has a core functional component plus secondary supporting components such as installation, training and support. In the same way that we focus on the core function when we are the buyer, our prospects associate the purchase price with the core function and ignore the secondary supporting components.

When shopping for a flat-screen TV, it's easy to compare prices across similar screen sizes. It's also easy to ignore secondary components like warranty, serviceability, user interface and service life, all of which can have a huge impact on purchase satisfaction. A consultative salesperson gets the buyer to consider how the secondary components might become critical aspects of a really good deal for them.

We could buy homeowners insurance based on the core coverage limits. We ask for quotes on policies with the same coverage limits from difference insurance companies, thinking that an "apples to apples" comparison will allow us to easily identify the best deal when we see the best price. Yet secondary components can be critical to our satisfaction with the purchase. Is there a single point of contact such as a local agent whom we can talk to when we have questions or problems? How does their claim service work? Do they pay? Before Hurricane Katrina, thousands of victims believed they had found the best price on insurance. Later they learned their insurance companies wouldn't pay their hurricane damage claims, leaving them devastated and homeless. Best price no longer seems like such a good deal to them. Sadly, we often don't take time to consider the whole product until after we've learned an expensive lesson.

II. Enable the Need-Full Purchase
Many secondary components may be worthless to the purchaser and may not be part of their good deal at all. Until the salesperson understands the buyer's situation and what the buyer really needs the purchase to do for them, the salesperson is in no position to recommend the right combination of product or service components for the customer.

Prospects often revert to making decisions based on "best price" because they don't even know which questions to ask. A consultative salesperson can educate the prospect on potential questions and then be prepared to help find answers to those the prospect finds relevant to their needs. This gives the salesperson an opportunity to establish trust by being an advocate for the consumer. Salespeople who suggest self-serving or biased questions that are slanted toward the seller's product or service will only erode trust and jeopardize the sale.

A good deal provides more than just what the customer asked for; it also satisfies what they intended to do. It's up to the salesperson to make sure everyone is clear on what that is so the purchase can fulfill as many needs as is practical.

III. Make the Deal Safe
Consultative salespeople can promise every prospect a good deal because they know that everyone wants something more than just the best price. Lazy salespeople will simply give prospects what they ask for instead of what they really need. Take an approach that ensures your customers never throw their money away.

The consultative salesperson knows that a customer usually loses when the purchase decision is made primarily on price. Customers are almost always limited by time and money, but spending less than what is really required to satisfy the purchase intent is a waste of those resources. The product or service purchased is often incapable of performing all that the buyer needs done. The buyer risks losing their entire investment and more; when homeowners insurance doesn't pay a claim, the insurance premiums are gone and so is their home.

A good deal may not be a perfect deal, but it is always a safe deal. When you give a buyer everything they need so they are not wasting their money, you can feel satisfied in knowing you are giving them a really good deal even though your price may not be the best price.

Good Deal Trumps Best Price
When customers believe the best price is more important than a good deal, you've already lost the sale. Use the consultative selling approach to uncover your buyer's unspoken needs, understand their application intent, and link them to the relevant components of your whole product. Show them how the solution you offer is a safe bet for them, and your new customer will soon be telling all their friends about the good deal they got from you.

© 2007 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson works with selling organizations to convert sales trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Visit http://ConsultativeSelling.com for a simple definition of Consultative Selling and articles to learn more about where and how to apply it.

Note: This consultative selling article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author information we provide at the end of the article.

The Sorry Epidemic

By Paul Johnson

1,336 words. Abstract: How could you ever go wrong saying "I'm Sorry"? Many people go wrong every day, and productivity, relationships and credibility are at stake. Learn when and when not to say "I'm sorry" before you're really sorry. Plus, learn how to make The Big Apology when you make a big mistake.

"My bad!" So sad. Sorry is everywhere. It flows out of people's mouths almost with every breath (OK, I exaggerate). While you might not have noticed (or consider it grating as I do), you can't afford to ignore the reasons behind our propensity to say "I'm sorry."

While apologizing can be beautiful, quantity diminishes quality, and to everyone's detriment. It's a shame, too, because the phrase "I'm sorry" has the tremendous ability to heal relationships. In fact, anyone familiar with love knows full well that you DO have to say you're sorry from time to time, contrary to the 1970 film Love Story that advises, "Love means never having to say you're sorry." Yes, the proper application of "Sorry" can work wonders. However, its misapplication suggests that maybe people are taking on too much.

For instance:

• As I'm walking down a corridor, a woman steps in front of me through a doorway and offers, "I'm sorry."
• The woman at the nearby drink dispenser knocks some ice cubes to the floor. As I bend over to pick up my bag, she offers "I'm sorry."

To each person I must ask, "Sorry for what?" While each offer of "sorry" sounds polite, I suspect it masks something more insidious, though innocent.

What's Wrong with "Sorry!"??
I'm no psychologist, and I'm no Mr. Manners (I swill beer straight out of the bottle and am easily confused by forks) but I suspect the epidemic of sorry is caused by a growing sense of guilt. We feel guilty for eating the wrong foods, for not spending enough time with family, and for polluting the planet. We don't exercise enough, we forget to send thank-you notes, and we don't lead balanced lives. This seems like way more guilt than any of us deserve! After all, most of the time each of us is doing the best we can. While there certainly is an appropriate time to say, "I'm sorry," (and I'll clarify that later), inappropriate offerings of "Sorry" only serve to increase our feelings of guilt, anxiety and perhaps even paranoia.

Sorry for Whom?
Most offerings of "I'm sorry" are intended to relieve our own feelings of guilt more than out of genuine concern for the other person. I suspect we're too busy to invest in relationships, and rather than take time to find out what's really bugging the other person we find it more convenient to say "I'm sorry" and run away.

If it's hard to accept my claim that we say "I'm sorry" for our benefit and not because we need others to hear it, any pet owner can back me up.

After the vet stitched up our dog Izzy's back leg, we were required to make her wear a plastic cone around her head to prevent her from turning and chewing her stitches. Every time I looked at her forlorn face inside that stupid cone, I found myself saying, "I'm sorry, Izzy." Eventually, I reminded myself that she can't understand what I'm saying. While I sympathized with her condition, verbalizing "I'm sorry" only served to assuage my own discomfort with the situation. Sure, she was comforted by my words and attention, but ANY words would have sounded good to her. I chose "I'm sorry" because they sounded good to ME.

When to Say "I'm Sorry"
What if we were more judicious -- almost stingy -- in our application of sorry? Instead, what if we would take the time to understand what the other person needs, and then give it to them if possible? We would have better, healthier relationships. We would feel connected and confident instead of anxious and paranoid. This can happen when we raise our own awareness of other people and look outside ourselves. To help you do that, here are three tips to help you to decide when to say "I'm sorry" in a way that serves you AND the other person.

I. Anything and Everything
We can't be responsible for everything. Sometimes we're victims of poor timing, gravity, or the plain and simple accident. Focus your efforts on fixing the problem instead of accepting the blame, and you can stop saying, "I'm sorry."

The Enterprise car rental agent's first words to me are, "How are you?" I reply, "Terrible." His reaction: "I'm sorry." My response: "Why? It's not your fault my car broke and I have to rent a car from you." What could he have said instead? He could have replaced, "I'm sorry" with "How can I make your day better?" I would have been more inclined to believe he was there to service my needs rather than how self-absorbed and sorry he was that he asked me "How are you?"

II. Just Plain Wrong
While "anything and everything" describes an innocent abuse of "sorry," we also find blatant abuse. This occurs when someone knowingly wrongs another, and then says "Sorry" in an attempt to make the act seem less offensive.

I'm meeting with a client we'll call Phil in his office when someone I'll call Dick appears in the doorway, interrupts us in mid-sentence and shanghais the conversation for the next five minutes. As he walks away, his final words are, "Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you." Clearly, he did. I would have rather heard, "Thanks for tolerating my interruption. I owe you one." Instead, his false apology merely adds insult to injury.

III. Responsibility for Performance
This is the only situation in which it's appropriate to say "I'm sorry." You must accept responsibility for poor performance when you could have influenced the outcome. If you signed up for a task and didn't deliver to expectations, you should be sorry; that's an error. If you find yourself in a situation where you could have helped through less than superhuman efforts but didn't even make an effort, you should be sorry; that's an omission. Knowing when to accept responsibility is the key.

OK, I'll concede the use of "I'm sorry" at funerals, even when you didn't cause the death. In my youth, I learned (after the fact) that adults find "I'm sorry for your loss" more comforting than "That's too bad." Live and learn.

Saying "I'm sorry" excessively only makes you feel guilty, helpless and overwhelmed. It distorts your view of how bad things are instead of helping you isolate those areas where you can have a positive effect. It lowers your productivity and distracts you from what's really important. You may find it helpful to remember this:

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference." (from The Serenity Prayer, Reinhold Niebuhr)

The Big Apology
The greatest gift we can give each other is our forgiveness. When someone has truly and gravely wronged us, it requires much generosity on our part to be able to say, "I forgive you," and mean it. If everyone uses "I'm sorry" as a throw-away line like "How are you?" how will we really know when others need the gift of forgiveness?

When you do make a serious blunder with family, friends, co-workers or customers, you need to do two things. The first is to verbalize your sincere acceptance of responsibility through "I'm sorry for..." or "I apologize for..." I highly recommend, "I apologize from the bottom of my heart." But don't stop there. Seek closure by adding this second part: "Will you accept my apology?" or "Will you forgive me?" It may require further discussion before you hear a "Yes" (or "No"), but to close the matter it's important that every apology that's delivered is also accepted. Sadly, some apologies may never be accepted.

Inoculate yourself from the epidemic of sorry and you'll feel better about yourself, your relationships, your productivity, and your focus. You'll replace anxiety, guilt, and paranoia with connectedness, confidence, and concern for those around you. It's time to trade in your sorry life for one that will create better relationships and better results.

© 2007 Paul Johnson. All rights reserved.

About The Author:
Paul Johnson of Shortcuts to Results works with organizations to convert trouble into double and triple digit performance breakthroughs. Learn breakthrough concepts at http://ShortcutsToResults.com. Call Paul direct in Atlanta, Georgia, USA at (770) 271-7719.

Note: This article is available for reprint at no charge. We only ask that you include our copyright notice in your reprint, along with the About the Author (byline) information we provide at the end of the article.